Wednesday, May 22, 2013

2 months...already!?!

So, Dean turned 2 months old yesterday.  I can't believe how fast these last 2 months have gone!  Sure, the first 2-3 weeks dragged, but since Dean has been out of the hospital and doing so much better, the days are just flying by. 

I had my first Mother's Day this year :)  That was pretty cool.  We received a gift certificate for a family photo session (thank you again Jen and Stephanie!), so that's what we did!  And it was so much fun!  I'm looking forward to seeing all the pictures once they're done (Sweet Snaps by Tara, she's on FB!)

I’m amazed at how much he seems to grow each day (John’s made that observation and few times too).  I love getting up in the morning and seeing my precious little baby boy.  And now that I’m back at work, seeing his happy, smiling face when I pick him up from my parents' just makes my day.  :D

It’s not just Dean’s growth that has amazed me these last few weeks.  Just 2 months ago I became a mom.  Think about that.  Yeah, I know.  And I must say, as much as I love and adore my own mother, I have a greater appreciation for her now than I ever did.  And I realized this new-found appreciation the night we took Dean to the emergency room at the Children’s Hospital.

I'll always remember that night: He had only been home a week when we got the call we had to take Dean to Knoxville.  It was the quickest I believe I had ever packed.  I knew I would be staying down there with Dean, but I didn't know for how long.  John was going home after so he could finish out the work week.  I don’t remember the drive there at all, just that we needed to get there ASAP so Dean could get care.  As soon as we walked into the emergency room, Dean was taken to a room.  And a swarm of doctors and nurses (there had to be at least 10) came in to the room to get Dean all set up.  I had never been so scared in my life.  People are simultaneously taking blood from him and trying to get IVs in him.  I was standing as close as I could to him when a nurse told me I could take and hold his hands.  So there I stood, holding his precious little hands in mine as he’s screaming and crying.  I knew he was in pain, and that he was so scared.  John did his best to keep my face clean from all the tears I couldn't hold back.  That was really the moment I knew I had become a mom.

I remember, as a kid, getting hurt and my mom wanting to make it better.  She would say “I wish I could take the pain away,” or “I wish it was me instead of you.”  I just thought she was trying to make me feel better.  But looking down at Dean, face red and wet with tears, I wanted more than anything for it to be me instead of him.  I wanted to take the pain away and hold him, assuring that he was alright.  I wanted to endure that for him.  And it hurt my heart to no end.  That was when I thought back to all those times mom said those things, and I knew, with all my heart, she sincerely meant every word.

As I said, since that night Dean has gotten so much better.  He's such a cute little kid, if I do say so myself ;-)  In the words of the great LeVar Burton: "You don't have to take my word for it:"


Look at that handsome little man!  I'm such a happy and proud momma to have such an awesome and incredible baby :D

Dean's been pretty busy in his first couple months.  I'll touch on his adventures in a later blog.

Thanks for letting me share my heart.  I know what we went though with Dean is nothing compared to what other families have to endure.  It still wasn't an easy situation for us, and my heart goes out to those families.  I'm so grateful for my healthy baby boy.